You’re a Real Musician When:

You realize that the cheers from the audience after a particularly
difficult passage are for a sports play on the big screen TV over the
bar, and that in fact, no one is listening to you.

When the gig you drove 200 miles for to make $100, and had to pay for a
hotel room, is later referred to as your "summer tour".

When your most sincere, heartfelt comments are made by people that are
drunk and who won’t remember you in the morning.

When you are repeatedly told that the lead singer who can’t read, never

JUST SILLY STUFF TO PUT A SMILE ON YOUR FACE from the great Hal Blaine............

If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days you would have produced enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee.

(Hardly seems worth it.)

If you farted consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough gas is produced to create the energy of an atomic bomb.

(Now that's more like it !)

The human heart creates enough pressure when it pumps out to the body to squirt blood 30 feet.

(O.M.G.!)

A pig's orgasm lasts 30 minutes.

It's Hell to be Old

OLD people have problems that you haven't even considered yet!

An 85-year-old man was requested by his doctor for a sperm count as part of his physical exam.

The doctor gave the man a jar and said, 'Take this jar home and bring back a semen sample tomorrow.'

The next day the 85-year-old man reappeared at the doctor's office and gave him the jar, which was as clean and empty as on the previous day.

Happy Holidays to everyone! This season sometimes brings stress so don't let it get you down and if it does ..... that BEER IS GOOD! Tony

Long time- no talk. I hope everyone is doing well out there. I see everyone is still blogging away and making their thoughts and wishes known to the Toto World. I've gotten so many messages from the Toto fans, I thought it was about time to chime in and say hello. I've been really busy writing on several projects lately, and one of them (the new band I'm in now, is almost finished with the CD we've been working on for a few months). Tomorrow, I will finish the final vocal of the last song, and we'll enter the Mixing/Mastering phase of the CD before we release it.

 Upon hearing that her elderly grandfather had just passed away, Katie went straight to her grandparent's house to  visit her 95-year-old grandmother to comfort her. 
When she asked how her Grandfather had died, her grandmother replied, He had a heart attack while we were making love on Sunday morning." 
Horrified, Katie told her grandmother that 2 people nearly 100 years old having sex would surely be asking for trouble. 
Oh no, my dear, replied granny.
"Many years  ago, realizing our advanced age,  we figured out the best time to do it was when the church bells would start to ring.